


Zuko’s Secret

by KASYD



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Aang Understands, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, Female Zuko (Avatar), Hurt Zuko (Avatar), PLEASE READ CONTENT WARNINGS AT BEGINNING, They think Zuko’s a guy, Toph Beifong and Zuko are Siblings, Zhao is Awful, Zuko (Avatar)-centric, Zuko Joins The Gaang Early (Avatar), Zuko is Understood Earlier, Zuko is an Awkward Turtleduck, Zuko’s secretly a girl
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-18
Updated: 2021-03-04
Packaged: 2021-03-10 23:42:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,693
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28165692
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KASYD/pseuds/KASYD
Summary: Zuko was a girl... but no one could know that.It’s a lot harder to hide when in the Gaang, especially when harboring a crush on Sokka.
Relationships: Katara & Zuko (Avatar), Sokka & Zuko (Avatar), Sokka/Zuko (Avatar), The Gaang & Zuko (Avatar), Toph Beifong & Zuko
Comments: 13
Kudos: 343





	1. Chapter 1

Gender wasn’t something Zuko really thought twice about before the Agni Kai. 

She was born female and grew up as such, though she never understood why her mother would dress her in masculine clothes. 

Zuko understood now, she wasn’t Azula, she would’ve been eaten alive as the weak princess of the palace, she had been Ozai’s shame so he never announced her as his daughter, just as his child, leaving her gender to the people to determine. 

She’d never been more grateful for anything. 

After she was banished she traveled the word in distress, the Avatar wasn’t anywhere she wasn’t going home and she was always going to be the dishonorable child of Ozai. 

*

The first time she truly shielded behind being presented as male was the first time she met Zhao, a year into her banishment. 

“Aren’t you a pretty thing?” He had asked her. 

Horror had run through her, he could know could he? 

There’s was nothing about Zuko that would suggest anything but male, her hair was cut into a Phoenix Tail and her armor left everything to the imagination. 

Her eyes had widened and she felt the urge to throw up but instead shot back, “Can’t say the same about you!” 

Zhao’s face had tightened in anger and he’d boldly requested to speak with her Uncle instead, Zuko was just happy to get him out of her face. 

*

When she and her crew were sailing in the South Pole and spotted the beacon Zuko’s life was filled with something anew, hope. 

She’d stepped off her ship and had demanded that the tribe handed the Avatar over to her. 

Zuko watched as the women and children cowered away not a single man in sight. 

That is until a battle cry turned her attention towards a man charging towards her, not man boy. 

She flipped him over her shoulder and out of the way with no trouble and demanded the Avatar show themselves. 

Then out of no where a bald boy in orange and yellow dropped from the sky in front of Zuko and agreed to come with her if she left the tribe alone. 

Zuko agreed and escorted the Avatar onto her ship, locked him in the brig, and when to her room to write the letter to her father. 

He escaped despite the fight she but up and Zuko found herself in a cycle of chase catch loose. 

*

The next time her gender came up was when Zhao boarded her ship after a report of her finding the Avatar escaped. 

“I heard you’ve had contact with the Avatar.” Zhao had said to her, Uncle’s presence warm at her side. 

Zuko needed to shut this conversation down before it got out of hand, “Well apparently you’ve been listening to gossip, get better sources.”

Zhao’s brow had furrowed and he’d snapped, “I don’t think anyone of your standing should be talking back to me.” 

He probably meant her standing as a banished royal but the malicious look in Zhao’s eyes made Zuko worry that maybe he was questioning her from a different standing, her gender. 

Zhao couldn’t know could he? 

The only people who knew were mother, the Firelord, Uncle, and Azula.

Not the most secure list with Azula on there. 

Luckily Uncle butted in and filled Zuko’s startled silence, “You’ve been working under us for many years Zhao, I’m surprised you haven’t received a promotion yet.”

Zuko stuck close to Uncle’s side and tried to ignore the piercing looks Zhao gave her as Uncle assured Zhao of their failure. 

*

When she heard news of Zhao capturing the Avatar she simply had to know wether or not they were true. 

So in a true Zuko manner she donned her Blue Spirit mask and her blades and broke into the high security prison, it was humorously easy. 

Once inside she learned that the rumors were true and the Avatar was captured there, Zuko decided she would go through with her plan in freeing him for her own capture. 

After wandering the halls she eventually located the cell of the Avatar, and got in without a problem. 

Zuko drew her blades to cut him free, wincing at the sound of his panic as she did so. 

Then she turned to leave, she did her part, the Avatar was free and would escape from Zhao so she could capture him instead. 

But he yelled after her, “Who are you? What’s going on? Are you here to rescue me?” 

She sighed but gestured for him to follow her. 

“I guess you are.” Zuko heard him say.

She silently led the Avatar out of the prison, they managed to avoid detection until they reached the main wall of the prison.

Zuko was considering how to get both of them to the top undetected when the Avatar shot a gust of wind under her feet and she was blown on top of the wall with a very undignified and female scream. 

A scream that not only made her nervous of the Avatar questioning her gender but also gave their position away. 

She and the Avatar burst into battle, they actually made a pretty good team if Zuko ignored the fact that they were enemies. 

By some miracle they reached the ground and were only 50 meters from the forest when the arrows were aimed at them. 

“Hand over the Avatar!” Zhao demanded from on top of the tower.

Zuko was filled with adrenaline from the anger his voice filled her with, she fluidly pressed both of her swords against the neck of the Avatar. She almost felt bad when the boy gasped in fear. 

“Let them go.” Zhao finally ordered frustratedly. 

Zuko backed them up slowly until they were practically into the woods and then she made a break for it, dragging the Avatar by his wrist as fast as she could. 

But just Zuko’s luck the single arrow that made it through the woods was the one that struck her in the head, knocking her unconscious and halting her rescue/capture of the Avatar. 

*

When she opened her eyes Zuko was more than surprised when she found the Avatar sitting patiently next to her.

“Hi,” He said when he turned to her, “Thanks for saving me.”

Zuko stayed silent, her head throbbed with what was definitely a concussion and she couldn’t think of anything to say regardless. 

“I used to have a friend from the Fire Nation, his name was Kuzon and he and I were inseparable, except for when I was trapped in ice I guess. Not the point anyways, I know that people from the Fire Nation aren’t bad people, I was good friends with one, do you think that we could’ve been friends, maybe if the world was a little different right now?” He asked softly. 

Zuko took a moment to genuinely consider what he had said, “Sorry Avatar, a friendship between us is unlikely, I have to capture you and you want to be free so it’s very unlikely.”

“Why do you have to capture me?” The Avatar questioned, “I haven’t committed any treason against the Fire Nation or done anything to wrong it.”

She didn’t know what to say, “Those were my orders, if I brought the Avatar to the Firelord then my banishment would be uplifted.”

“You’re banished?” The Avatar gasped. 

Zuko just nodded, she knew that this conversation had to come to an end. 

“What did you do?” He asked. 

“Something to dishonor the Firelord and myself, I protested the words of a superior and was dishonorable during the Agni Kai to settle it.” Zuko answered. 

Aang could faintly remember Kuzon talking about Agni Kai’s, the only way to be dishonorable during one was to cheat.

Zuko must’ve done something pretty bad at the Agni Kai to be banished. 

“Did you cheat? Or attack before or after the match?” Aang pressed, nervous to find out what kind of person he was sitting next to. 

“No, I refused to fight, stupid. I dishonored the Fire Nation by begging for mercy.” Zuko responded

Aang was frozen, that was awful, this wasn’t a monster sitting next to him but a victim, a young one, how old was Zuko anyway? He caught a glimpse of the scar on Zuko’s face, it looked old. Zuko couldn’t be any older than 17. 

Aang thought of the cruelty it would take to set someone’s face on fire, how much it had to have hurt, as Kuzon once said when he was training his own firebending, ‘Firebenders don’t burn easy.’

“How old were you?” Aang asked. 

“13.” She curtly responded. 

Aang felt like he was punched in the gut just then, Zuko had been 13. Meaning that Zuko had been looking for the Avatar for 3 years before Aang even showed up. Zuko had been one year older than Aang was right now. 

“I don’t have the energy to capture you right now, could you please go? They can’t know that I’m the Blue Spirit.” Zuko murmured as she stiffly got to her feet. 

Aang nodded but then he remembered, “My frogs!” 

Zuko watched the boy scurry off questioningly but didn’t have the energy to think of what the Avatar could need with frogs.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CONTENT WARNING FOR POSSIBLE TRIGGERS: 
> 
> Sexual Harassment and implications
> 
> Sorry it got all clumped up at the end it wouldn’t let me edit it

It was night when it happened. 

She was practicing her breathing alone on the ship when she heard the first explosion, with no hesitation at all she burst out of the brig and dove overboard as the rest of the ship was blown to smithereens. 

Underwater she knew what had happened, Zhao had found out she was the Blue Spirit. 

She broke through the surface but was careful to swim as unnoticeably as possible. 

Zuko reached the shore and the sound of Uncle’s anguish filled her ears. 

“Uncle!” She called when she couldn’t take the sound of his grieving anymore. 

He turned to her and rushed to embrace her. 

“Thank goodness you’re alright.” Uncle sighed in relief. 

“Actually Uncle, I died in the explosion and you’re going to join Zhao to avenge me.” Zuko responses with a growing smile. 

A genuine smile grew on Uncle’s face, “Of course.”

*

Stowing away on Zhao’s ship was a lot easier than it should’ve been. 

She hid in between the barrels of blasting jelly and listened in to Zhao’s plans. 

When he mentioned killing the Moon Spirit that’s when Zuko messed up. 

“Then I’ll kill them Moon Spirit,” Zhao had said, “And bring honor to the Fire Nation.”

Those words triggered a reaction in Zuko made her let out a hiss in anger, that sound was unfortunately enough for her to get caught. 

“Stowaway!” The guard who had caught her yelled. 

She would’ve reacted, used her bending to silence the man, but Fire Bending was unwise when surrounded by blasting jelly. 

Zuko could do nothing but fruitlessly punch kick and scratch at the man as he pinned her down and dragged her onto the deck. 

“General Zhao, I found a stowaway.” The man said as he dragged her up to him.

Zuko had never seen such a terrifying smile in her life, “Ah, Zuko, thank you for joining us.”

“You’ll regret this! When my uncle—“ Her threat was cut off when her face was shoved into the deck as she was forced into a bow in front of Zhao. 

“Silence. General Iroh is unaware of your survival in the brig, you have no one coming to aid you. Chain our “prince” up!” Zhao ordered with a growing smile. 

Zuko flared with anger, “Zhao you stupid mother of a—“ 

“And gag him!” Zhao added agitatedly. 

Zuko was chained with fire-bending proof chains and cuffs to the center of the deck, she hissed all the fire she could before they shoved a muzzle onto her head and around her mouth. 

She felt her confidence waver at with the claustrophobia that filled her as she tried to breath through the muzzle. 

“Leave us.” Zuko heard Zhao order his men. 

That’s when the panic set in. 

Zuko hyperventilated as the bit in her mouth started to make her jaw ache and the muzzle dug marks into her face and the last soilder’s foot step retreated and— 

“So,” Zhao said, breaking through Zuko’s panic attack, “What might the banished prince of the Fire Nation be doing trying to sabotage my attack on the North? Committing treason I assume.” 

Treason?! 

Zuko wasn’t committing treason! 

She was trying to stop Zhao from killing the Moon Spirit, a spirit which they needed as the rest of the world did. 

Zuko stayed silent, it’s not like she could respond anyway. 

“You know it’s funny,” He continued, “When you were banished I heard a rumor before you left, something that I found quite interesting to be honest.” 

Oh no, where was this going? 

Zuko could help the tremble that had taken over her body. 

“Yes, I remember now, a servant woman mentioned her gratitude that there were two Fire Nation princesses and that your banishment wouldn’t harm the Firelord’s agenda.” 

No. 

No, he knew. 

He knew! 

She was chained up on his ship with no one around and he knew that she was a girl! 

If she wasn’t panicking before she was now. 

“I didn’t believe it at first, you have quite masculine features, but during my fight with the Blue Spirit I noticed something, a prince wouldn’t have the figure of a woman would he?” Zhao prodded, pushing Zuko off the point of fear, “And we both know who the Blue Spirit is.” 

She froze when his hand made contact with her skin, a hand around her neck. 

“You could’ve been quite beautiful if it wasn’t for that brand of dishonor, Princess Zuko.” Zhao said. 

Zuko couldn’t help the sob that left her throat as his hand began to slip down her collarbones to her chest. 

“So that’s how you kept it hidden,” Zhao said, referring to her chest, “These bandages must hurt, why don’t we remove them?” 

Zuko finally let out a scream, it was blocked out by the muzzle but it echoed and definitely expressed the anguish and fear she felt. 

Her voice sounded shrill and feminine in her panic but she could hardly care about that now. 

Zhao was getting annoyed, “Quiet, your Uncle is sitting in a prison cell at the moment, we both know that he can’t help you.” 

He got closer and wrapped his arms around her, his slimy coiling compressing arms, he pressed his nose against her neck. 

“I don’t know how you fooled anyone, you even smell like a woman.” Zhao purred. 

If Zuko hadn’t felt like being sick she definitely did right then, she struggled against Zhao’s constructor grip but only succeeded in making him chuckle, “You’re sexy when you struggle.” That was it, Zuko jerked with all her might and smashed the muzzle attached to her face into Zhao’s head. They both let out yells of pain as Zuko felt the bones in her face throb in pain. “You bitch, you’ll regret that.” Zhao growled as he cradled the bleeding wound on his head. She couldn’t respond because the next thing she knew the door to brig was blasted open with a flare of flame. Out of the fire stepped Uncle Iroh, broken chains dragged behind him and steam furiously coming out of his nose as he took in what was happening. He got into a fighting stance, “Zhao, you face a fate worse than death for touching Zuko.” Then everything erupted in flames, Zhao and Uncle Iroh fought with all they had, Uncle Iroh with his fury and Zhao with his fear. Midway through the fight Uncle had his back to Zuko, he turned to her and quickly said, “I’ll break your chains.” She nodded and held her chains away from her body for Uncle to break, he broke them with his heel with no trouble, “Go Zuko! Be safe!” Zuko nodded and forced all the emotions that surged through her into the back of her head, she needed to warn someone of Zhao’s plan, even if Uncle took care of Zhao other soldiers still likely had orders to kill the moon spirit. In a rush she found her escape boat and rowed with all her might towards the shore, Zuko was halfway there when she sensed the incoming fireball. She jumped from the boat into the icey water just in the nick of time as her boat was blown into smithereens. Zuko panicked for a second, she was in freezing cold water in enemy waters with a muzzle on. Then she remembered all her breath training and knew that she could do this. When Zuko opened her eyes the first thing she noticed were the retreating turtle seals, she’d found their opening in the ice. Zuko broke through the surface for a few deep breaths of air through her nose before diving into the unknown.


	3. Chapter 3

She burst through the surface with a strangled inhale, Agni she needed to get this thing off or she was going to pass out. 

But Zuko was there, she had infiltrated the Northern Water Tribe, sure she was frozen, soaked to the bone, and about to pass out from lack of oxygen, but she was alive, so that was a start.

Zuko pulled herself from the opening in the ice and staggered up the stairs to her left, the city was empty due to the incoming battle so Zuko was free to wheeze and stumble all she wanted. 

She was nearing the center of the city when a quiet thrumming filled her head, it was familiar... the Avatar.

What was he doing?

Zuko followed the thrumming which only got louder as she reached a small wooden door, must be the entrance. 

She braced herself as she pushed the door open, as soon as she slipped inside she ducked for cover. 

There was no yell but the sound of chatter filled the air, there were people here with the Avatar, and if it was the people that came to mind they would be far less friendly towards her than the Avatar was.

She slowly made her way towards what looked like an Oasis in the middle of all of this cold, the voices got louder and Zuko did all she could to quiet her step. 

“Who’s there?!” Yelled out the voice he knew was probably the water tribe girl. 

Zuko knew she needed them to trust her, it was hard to trust someone if they were hidden.

She stepped onto the bridge that lead to the Oasis with her hands up, she couldn’t say anything with the muzzle over her head so she began to bowed the best she could but was stopped from doing so when she was struck on the back of the head with something sharp. 

Zuko barely held back a scream as another vibration ran through her sore and broken face.

“Zuko?” The girl asked, staring at her with wide eyes, untrusting but concerned. 

She stayed silent as she blinked away the pain and took deep breathes through her nose but nodded. 

“What is that thing.” The voice of the water tribe boy asked in horror.

Zuko looked up and glared when she saw the offending boomerang in his hand, so that was what hit her. 

She couldn’t answer obviously but once the throbbing in her face eased she put her hands into the pleading motion. 

“She wants us to take it off of her.” The girl with pure white hair stated as she walked towards them. 

Zuko recognized her stance immediately, the girl was royal. 

She switched her pleading for a polite bow, royal to royal, not that she was really royal anymore. 

“So this is Prince Zuko of the Fire Nation I’ve been told so much about,” The princess murmured as she examined Zuko, “I imagined you a bit more monstrous based on their stories.”

Zuko’s face heated up, not with anger, but due to the fact that this princess knew about her, bad things apparently. 

She once again couldn’t respond but before she could possibly give a hand motion in response the water tribe girl butted in, “I think it’s for the best he’s muzzled, we don’t want him kidnapping Aang the moment he’s freed.”

Zuko sighed but she’d expected this response, speaking of the Avatar where was he?

The water tribe boy unintentionally answered her question for her, “How long is he going to stay in the Spirit World anyway? He’s been in there for hours.”

So the Avatar’s in the Spirit World, ok, that’s kind of random, isn’t he supposed to be protecting the Moon Spirit?

You know, the Moon Spirit that takes physical form and isn’t in the spirit world?!

Oh Agni, the Avatar was looking for the Moon Spirit in the Spirit World and was leaving the real Spirit vulnerable!

Zuko tried to evoke her panic and how they needed to get the Avatar out of the Spirit World and find the physical manifestation of the Moon Spirit, but as soon as she stepped forward a blade of ice was aimed at her chest. 

“One more move and I’ll kill you.” The Water Tribe girl threatened. 

Woah, that was a bit extreme even in Zuko standards. 

“Woah woah woah, Katara! What are you doing?!” The Water Tribe boy protested, pulling at his sister’s arm.

“If he gets a chance he’d kidnap Aang and kill us, I’m just returning the threat.” Katara responded curtly. 

First of all, Zuko had never wanted to kill anyone in their group and second of all, she was trying to help them!

She hissed in frustration and took a few steps back to the top of the small bridge, they didn’t approach her. 

Zuko sighed and tried to rub and her face, oh yeah, she had a muzzle on. 

She began to look around, if the Spirit had a physical manifestion than it would be very obvious, it would be uniquely colored or have a ethereal glow. 

“Stop look for a way to get in!” Katara butted in, “There isn’t any!” 

Zuko rolled her eyes and continued her examination, there was nothing on the outskirts of the Oasis that’s for sure, she’d need to get further in, probably to the center to find the Spirit. 

She turned back to the group of Water Tribe kids and watched as they argued, this looked like it would take a while. 

It took so long for Zuko for find this place it would take forever for Zhao or and of his soldiers to find it, she could rest a bit until then, and then she plopped onto the floor as her legs collapsed with exhaustion. 

She leaned her head against the wall of the bridge and took deep breathes through her nose, they were still hissed and painful but they were breathes. 

Only when Zuko sat down did all the pain in her body come to her attention, her face throbbed with everlasting pain, some bones in it were definitely broken, she still had her bruises and scratches from when her ship exploded which felt like forever ago, even if it was just a few hours before. 

Long story short Zuko felt like hell and looked like hell but she couldn’t care any less as long as she could protect the Moon Spirit, if she defended it they’d most likely trust her.

The thing was, they didn’t even know that the Avatar was looking in the wrong place for the Moon Spirit!!!

The frustration helped fuel her inner flame and she began to heat up to dry her soaked outfit, steam came off of her in waves. 

“What are you doing?! Stop fire-bending now!” Katara yelled threatening Zuko again with a blade of ice.

Zuko could hardly care anymore, what was another wound at this point?

But the girl didn’t back off, “Get up, stop fire-bending!” 

She was really starting to annoy Zuko, but with pained grunt Zuko got of the ground and stood on her unsteady legs, her head felt fuzzy and she felt as if there was water stuck in her lungs. 

“Why are you here?! How did you get here?!” Katara questioned, questions Zuko literally couldn’t answer in her state. 

“Katara, she literally can’t answer you.” The Water Tribe boy sighed, finally someone was stating the obvious. 

“We can take it off can’t we?” Asked Princess Yue’s soft voice, “I can’t imagine how painful it would be.”

Huh, Water Tribe royalty’s formality never failed to surprise Zuko. 

“We shouldn’t Sokka, he’ll take Aang as soon as he can.” Katara replied, never taking her eyes off of Zuko.

“Um, I think if he managed to infiltrate the Northern Water Tribe with that thing on, he could kidnap Aang regardless.” Sokka inputted, well that wasn’t helping her case. 

“Please take it off.” Princess Yue asked softly again, at least someone was on Zuko’s side, “I think it’s hurting him.”

Why would she think that? 

Zuko felt completely fine! 

Zuko felt— felt—-

The sound of liquid hitting the floor broke Zuko out of her internal protest, she looked down to see— blood on the floor. 

Who’s blood was that?

“Tui and La, are you okay?” Sokka asked, his eyes were wide and his hands were held out as if he was trying to comfort a wounded animal. 

She was about to grunt in response when she felt it, the wound the blood was coming from, the muzzle had cut into her cheeks, inside and outside, badly. 

Oh crap, she was going to choke on her own blood, drown in her own blood!

The sound of someone stepping towards her made Zuko jump back and put up her hands in protest, not to firebend but to cover her chest. “It’s ok, I’m going to get this thing off of you, but you can’t take Aang, if you take Aang we’ll never help you again.” Sokka told her. Zuko nodded in response and let him step into her space to examine the muzzle. Sokka murmured to her as he fiddled around with it, “Contraptions like this always have a weak spot, I just gotta, oh! There!” Then the muzzle came off her face with a click, with all the energy in her Zuko ripped the muzzle off her face and threw it as far as she could, it still wasn’t far enough. With her mouth free Zuko immediately began to breath as much as she could, it almost felt weird to take in so much oxygen at once. She turned towards Sokka, to thank him, but the horrified look on his face reminded her of what she must look like right now. “Thanks.” Zuko croaked, immediately regretting it as her throat throbbed in protest, she offered a small bow from the ground with it.

Then she remember the reason for her panic before, ignoring the pain that wracked her body Zuko anxiously tried to explain with her pained throat, “They’re going to try to kill the Moon Spirit, that’s Zhao’s plan, we need to keep the spirit safe.”

“Woah woah woah, he’s trying to kill the Moon Spirit? Not only is that looney but it’s impossible, the Moon Spirit’s in the spirit world!” Sokka protested.

Zuko huffed, “Spirits often take physical form when they’re inactive, the Moon Spirit hasn’t been present in hundreds of years so they’re most likely in a physical manifestion.”

“That mean’s Aang’s looking in the wrong place!” Sokka gasped, tugging at Katara’s arm in panic. Zuko turned to Princess Yue, “Princess Yue, this is your nation, you know where the Moon spirit is don’t you?” The princess’ face twisted in conflict, “I can’t say that I do, I mainly am a symbol of security for the people.” Zuko could help the way her eyes narrowed, “That’s dumb, a princess should know all she can about her Nation so that she can do what’s best for it.” “Like you know anything about being a Princess.” Katara scoffed. Zuko decided not to comment despite how humorous the ignorant statement was and instead asked, “May I step into the Oasis, I believe I would recognize a spirit if I saw one.” “Why would you recognize a spirit?” Katara questioned as Zuko waited patiently. Zuko poked at the still bleeding marks on her face and answered, “Because I’ve seen one before.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: DISCUSSION OF ASSAULT AND SCENES OF PTSD

Zuko walked silently ahead of the Water Tribe siblings and Princess Yue, she had a feeling that there was a weapon ready to strike her if she made a wrong move but Zuko could hardly care less right now, she was scanning every inch of the forest for a sign of the spirit. 

“So, when you were little you met the Sun Spirit?” Princess Yue asked conversationally. 

Zuko almost felt flattered by her effort to fill the silence, she decided to humor her. 

“Yes, Agni came before me.” Zuko confirmed, not turning back to see anyone’s reactions. 

“Did they say anything to you?” Yue continued. 

Zuko thought of what she should say, she’d been on her deathbed when Agni came to her, lying on sweat soaked sheet with her face completely wrapped up, sick with infection. 

“They told me to live.” Zuko finally answered, there had been a bit more to it than that but that was all they really needed to know. 

“If only you had listened and had gotten a life instead of chasing us down all the time!” Katara butted in. 

Zuko couldn’t hold back the snort of laughter that statement got out of her, “Hardy har har, it wasn’t like that.”

She could faintly hear the Water Tribe Teens whispering to each other a few paces behind her but something that caught her eye stopped her from trying to listen in. 

“Is this the center of the Oasis?” Zuko asked, question directed at Princess Yue. 

“Yes,” The Princess answered. 

Zuko examined the pond that marked the center of the Oasis, it had crystal clear water and there! Two ethereal koi were circling each other in the center of it, Tui and La, the Water Spirits. 

“There’s your spirits.” Zuko said pointing to the koi, “Don’t know how you didn’t notice them before.”

“But those are just koi!” Katara protested. 

Zuko turned to Katara, “Are you calling the spirits of Tui and La ‘just koi’?”

“I’m going to stay here and guard them from Zhao or any other Fire Nation soldier than intends to harm them, if you will allow me to Princess Yue.” Zuko said with a bow. 

A smile graced the white-haired girl’s lips, “You may, Prince Zuko.”

Zuko felt a surge of happiness rise through her at being called her old title, but she knew she had to correct them, if Father learned of her using a title of royalty after committing treason her fate would be worse than death, “Uh- I no longer have my Prince title Princess Yue, you may call me Zuko.”

Her eyes widened in surprise, “Why is that?”

“I committed treason by joining you, the Fire Lord will order my death on sight if I continue to use my title when I’m unworthy of it.”

“Uh,” Sokka butted in, “That’s messed up Dude, thanks for giving that up for us I guess.”

Zuko gave him a long look before sitting cross legged facing towards the circling koi, “It doesn’t matter now, I will guard the Moon Spirit the best I can and then I’ll move along.”

She closed her eyes and took deep breaths to calm the turmoil going on inside of her, the doubt filling her chest and flooding her throat, the pain wrapped around her neck and the hand on her chest and—

“Are you sure you’re ok?” Sokka asked. 

Zuko flinched to the side at the boy’s sudden presence and scooted a few feet away from him, “I’m fine, just sore.”

The boy examined her face before calling out, “Katara, come heal Zuko!” 

“What?!” Katara snapped, “I’m not healing a ash— him!” 

Zuko sighed but stayed silent, while she would’ve preferred if the angry girl stayed away from her she wouldn’t miss the awful pain in her body.

She could hear faint argument happening between Katara and the boy next to her but she elected to ignore it until she sensed Katara’s fuming aura approaching her, and suddenly she was on Zuko’s blind side.

Zuko scrambled away from the angry water bender, one of the few things she’d learned anything during her years of exile is that people who got to close to her face never had good intentions. 

“Just let me heal you,” Katara grumbled at the resisting fire-bender, “If you’re fighting with us you need to be at your best.”

“Be nice Katara.” Sokka reminded her before walking back towards Princess Yue.

Zuko reluctantly let the calmer girl bring her water near her and found herself on edge at the weird and comfortable feeling the water brought the cuts on her arms, she watched in fascination as they closed up and healed over. 

“I’ve heard that water based healing is quite hard to master, you must be a very talented bender.” Zuko remarked, not usually one to make conversation but uncomfortable enough to do so. 

“Eh, I guess I am, I don’t see it as anything special,” Katara responded as she drifted her water up to Zuko’s bruised shoulders, “I find it hard to be proud of when it’s the only thing I’m supposed to do in the North.”

Zuko’s eyebrow (and what was left of her other one) raised, “Women aren’t taught to fight in the Northern Water Tribe?” 

“No,” Katara sighed, “They found it obscene that I could, even more so when I asked to join in Aang’s waterbending practice.”

Zuko considered this, “One of the worst things imaginable in the Fire Nation is being untrained in fighting, I find this hard to understand. You must be one of the best Water Benders if you were fated to travel with the Avatar? Why do they still question you?” 

“I don’t know Zuko,” Katara huffed before quickly asking, “Can I heal up your nec— wait. What are those?”

She poked her finger at a point on Zuko’s neck and she let out a hiss, there was a bruise on her neck but Zhao didn’t choke her or anything he’d just pressed his face into her neck, so the bruises must be—

“Are these hickies Zuko?” Katara asked sternly. 

Oh Agni Zuko wanted to throw up, Zhao had marked her neck up, defiled her neck with his saliva and—

“The Northern Water Tribe is being invaded and you were off getting pleasure?!” Katara asked unbelievably. 

What?!

She didn’t think that Zuko was—

“Pleasure?” Sokka called from where he and Princess Yue were, “I’m going to need some context you guys.”

“Stop spying on us!” Zuko yelled in protest, cheeks turning red with each moment of shame. 

Sokka and the Princess began to approach the two of them and Zuko felt more panic kick in.

Oh Agni, this was getting way out of hand she should just say—

“Woah Dude, how fresh are those?” Sokka questioned as he got closer. Zuko tried to defend herself, “None of your business and they’re not—“ Katara cut her off once again “I can’t believe that while people are dying you were off getting—“ “Let him speak.” Princess Yue’s firm voice broke through Katara’s scolding. Her voice was strong enough to make any chaos come to a stop and leave everyone looking a Zuko expectantly as she boiled over in shame. “It was...Zhao,” Zuko forced herself to admit, when silence filled the oasis she added, “When I was chained up on his ship he gave them to me.” Zuko finally dared to look up at the Water Tribe teens only to be met with multiple horrified expressions. “W-what?” Sokka choked out finally, not one to keep his questions to himself. Zuko’s patience was running thin, “Are you deaf or something?! I said he chained me to his ship and gave me the marks on my neck!” Sokka seemed shocked by the outburst, “Dude I’m—“ “Zuko,” Katara broke in wide eyed, “Did... did Zhao touch you anywhere private?”

Zuko stiffened at the question, that must have been answer enough because Sokka silently got up and stormed off . 

“He just touched my neck and chest with his hands and hi- his tongue.” Zuko answered as she felt herself begin to understand the horrors she went through

“And this happened while you were m-muzzled, right?” Katara clarified with a increasingly concerned tone. 

Zuko couldn’t bring herself to speak anymore so she just nodded. 

Faintly she could hear Sokka hissing to himself a few feet away as he tried to contain his outburst, “That sicko! I could just— I should!”

Princess Yue finally spoke, “Zuko please let Katara heal your face and neck, Zhao won’t get away with what he did, I swear.”

The calmness yet fury from the princess made a new wave of anxiety run down her spine but she nodded and Katara sat down on Zuko’s good side to heal her neck. 

Princess Yue sat on her otherside but within her small field of vision, the princess was highly aware. 

Zuko did her best to breath calmly and deeply as the water surrounding her throat healed it, the feeling was weird but nothing like Zhao’s touches. 

“Make sure you get his mouth, I can’t imagine how painful that would be.” Princess Yue adds after Katara finishes. 

“I’m sorry, you’re going to need to open your mouth Zuko.” Katara said examining Zuko’s face. 

Sokka at that moment made his way over to them and sat in front of Zuko, “Sorry for the outburst Dude.” 

Zuko gave him a nod of acknowledgement before opening her mouth slightly for Katara to heal it. 

Katara did her best on the outside of his face but when her water began to drift into the inside of her cheeks Zuko’s breathing began to pick up, of course it did, she’d been in a muzzle for hours just a bit before. 

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” Katara apologized repeatedly as she healed Zuko as quickly as she could. 

Zuko could feel her good eye watering in distress when Katara finally finished. 

“There,” She sighed in relief, “Good as new.”

Zuko poked her cheek to find it as if it’d never been cut into, the only trace of the previous injury left was the remaining taste of iron in her mouth. 

“Thank you Katara,” Zuko said with a seated bow, then she turned to Sokka and Princess Yue, “And both of you.”

Sokka seemed determined to distract Zuko from what she went through as he said, “We’re gonna kick the butt of anyone who steps into this Oasis, they’ll be no match for team Boomeraang!” 

Zuko was beyond confused as Sokka expectantly pointed towards the boomeraang in his hand, also by the fact that she was included on this personal seeming team. 

“Why would we be called team boomerang if you’re the only one who uses it as a weapon?” Zuko asked, feeling dumb. 

Sokka was patient though and explained his (hilarious) pun, “It’s even more clever than that! I use a boomerang and the reason we’re on this quest is because of Aang, so boom! Team boomeraang!” 

Zuko narrowed her brow as she thought about his explanation, “I suppose that’s funny.” 

Katara snorted next to her, “You don’t need to lie to make him feel better Zuko, the team name makes almost no sense, you can admit it.”

Zuko didn’t know what to do, she was an expert at negotiations and etiquette, not whatever this was. 

“Don’t listen to her Zuko, I’m hilarious and funny just like you said.” Sokka protested, trying to counter his sister’s point. 

“Well, um, I’m, I don’t know I,” Zuko stammered as she tried to respond, Agni why was she so awkward! 

Princess Yue saved his hide once again, “Sokka perhaps if you created a pun that included more of us than we’d appreciate it more.”

Sokka groaned, “It took forever to think of Team Boomeraang!” 

Katara rolled her eyes and leaned to whisper to Zuko, “Don’t be afraid to be honest with him, the bozo only responds to blunt statements.”

Zuko nodded and made a mental note of the information and was about to put it into action as her comfort with the group increased but the sound of cursing in her native dialect made Zuko jump up in horror. 

The group looked at her questioningly. 

“Someone Fire Nation is here.” Zuko whispers to them as she prepared her hands for bending, “Be ready.”

Right as the words left her mouth Zhao stumbled into sight and he looked like... crap. 

Uncle had done a number on Zhao, his hair was burnt in countless places and his body trembled violently, was he cold?

Only unstable Fire-benders still got cold.

Speaking of his Uncle, where was he?

He couldn’t have lost to Zhao could he?

Zhao’s attention was finally drawn to them, his face split into a deranged smile, and in native Fire Nation he hissed, “You’re going to wish that the Firelord killed you at that Agni Kai.”


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: DISCUSSIONS OF DEATH

The Agni Kai...

Sometime Zuko felt like she’d dreamt the fight with her father, a rotten nightmare.

But here Zhao was, yelling about it for all that understood Fire Nation tongue to hear. 

Her head was filled with memories. 

Crying at her father’s feet, the pain of infection, dying of infection, wanting to die.

And while the memories sometimes varied Zuko often recalled her brief presence with Agni in what she thought were her final moments. 

She had been cold, so cold. 

Zuko was panting and shaking, eye wrappings leaving her as blind as a bat, and she was dying. 

Or at least that was what one of the voices she sometimes heard walking around her had said. “I don’t know how long he can take this.” The voice had said defeatedly. 

So that was it? Zuko had thought, she was dead? Nothing more than a smudge on the Royal family portrait? 

But Zuko already knew that, no one had ever suggested otherwise. 

Zuko felt herself sinking, it was nice, it was like sinking into a warm bath. Fuzzing and tingly but heating he muscles pleasantly and comfortably, nothing like the cold that was life. 

Wait. She was dying? That’s what this warmth was? But was so nice, life hurt so bad. Why couldn’t she just sink into the warmth? What was there possibly left for her in the cold? 

Anyone Zuko had left behind would be better off without her and there was no possible way to redeem herself to father. She should just let go, it’d be easier that way. 

She felt the warmth rise up to his face like a surging tide, there is was, a glimpse of light! Her eyes were wrapped and she could see so there was no way he was near life anymore! 

Zuko had willed herself towards the brilliant light, she was almost there! She was almost free! She was almost... 

The light didn’t lead to the afterlife like she’d hoped. Instead a forever changing figure rested as the source of the light. 

Zuko’s eyes hurt from the brightness, “Who are you?” 

In a voice that sounded like the harmony of multiple people the figure answered, “I am Agni, go back the way you came.” 

Shock ran down her spine, “But I want—“ 

“You wish death? Freedom from this world?” Agni interrupted, the light from their brilliance so strong that Zuko was left almost as blind as she would be alive. 

“Please.” Zuko begged, “Let me die.”

Agni voiced their response, “Your destiny is incomplete Zuko, a task only you’re worthy of completing lies ahead for you.” 

“What?! There’s no such thing! I have nothing in the real world!” Zuko protested, it was perfectly clear to her that there was nothing left for her in the land of the living. 

Agni once again intoned their truth, “Untrue, you have a fate and a Uncle who is waiting for you by your side. Do not succumb to the desire for escape, death is not escape Zuko.” 

Zuko felt choked up, Agni continued, “You are destined for greatness, so you must live!” 

Zuko was shocked into silence. Everything’s was at a standstill, if she’d had a heartbeat it would be pulsing loudly in her hears. But then she felt it, her face growing painfully cold and her fingers running numb as she felt herself be pulled from the sweet embrace of death. 

“No,” She cried when the pain returned, “Please.”

Just before she was completely sucked from the light, Agni’s voice proclaimed, “Don’t just survive Prince Zuko, live!” 

Zuko was thrown back into consciousness like a slap to the face, she took deep wheezing breaths as she tried to process what had just happened. 

“Nephew? Nephew?” Called the familiar voice of her Uncle, she could feel the heat he gave off by her bed side. 

“Uncle?” She croaked, voice crackling from misuse. 

“Oh Dear Nephew, thank Agni.” Uncle cried as he wrapped Zuko in a gentle embrace, “You nearly died.”

Zuko had cried and held back the urge to tell him that she wish she did. 

“Uncle, where are we?” She croaked. 

Uncle stilled, “Well, I suppose I have much to explain...”

*

Zuko had been filled with hope, all she needed was the Avatar and she could go home!

That must be the destiny Agni spoke of, she was sure of it. 

Zuko spent years exploring, pouring over texts, and training. But most of all waiting, impatiently. Uselessly. But right now she had a new purpose, the one thing she swore she’d never do. She was aiding the Avatar. Zuko stared at Zhao as he panted, he was twitching and is eyes were bloodshot. He wanted to kill the Moon Spirit, the spirit of the ocean and the tide, Zhao wanted to doom them all. It was treason. She sunk into a familiar fighting position with a glare, “You dishonor the Fire Nation with your treason, Zhao.”


End file.
